Posts

How Many Lo Pans?

Image
Today, I learned that James Hong played a David Lo Pan in addition to the one from "Big Trouble in Little China". This second Lo Pan appeared in an episode of the short-lived science fiction television series "The Chronicle". He played Another Lo Pan, this one with the first name of Ben in the TV show "Chuck". This made me curious. How many Lo Pans has James Hong played? A fairly exhaustive internet search culminated in a IMDB list of all of James Hong's characters. This gave me the the question that had been bothering me for most of the morning. How many Lo Pans has James Hong played? Three. David Lo Pan in "Big Trouble in Little China". David Lo Pan in "The Chronicle". Ben Lo Pan in "Chuck" That's it. That's all. It was really rather anticlimactic. But, what if... All Three Lo Pans were related? David Lo Pan #2 and Ben Lo Pan could have been descended from David Lo Pan #1 directly or they could be multi...

Facehugger - Butthugger?

Image
Does the existence of the Xenomorph Facehugger imply the existence of a Xenomorph Butthugger?

Knock knock Jokes from a Five-year Old

Image
  5 y/o son: "Knock knock." Me: "Who's there?" 5 y/o son : "Larry." Me: "Larry, who?" 5 y/o son : "Larry who goes to the potato store and buys a potato!" (Mad cackling) - - - - 5 y/o son : "Knock knock." Me: "Who's there?" 5 y/o son : "Chicken." Me: "Chicken, who?" 5 y/o son : "Chicken who goes to the potato store and buys a potato!" (More cackling)

I Like Hot Sauce

Image
Kids requested omelets for dinner. Ham and cheese for 4-year old son. Ham, cheese, and Bell Peppers for 2-year old daughter. Onion, bell pepper, ham, cheese, spinach, and some leftover rice for me. I added Scorpion Tabasco to mine. 2-year old looked at me and says "I like hot sauce". I told her that I didn't think she did. But she insisted. So I said "ok". ... ... And dribbled some regular Tabasco onto a couple of her egg bits. ... ... She made a face, stuck her tongue out, and proceeded to devour the saucy egg bits before loudly proclaiming "I like hot sauce!" once again. 

Dolly Parton is the Willy Wonka of 2024

Image
Move over Five Nights at Freddy's! Step aside Camp Crystal Lake! Pack your bags, Jigsaw! Dolly Parton has hidden 10 Butterfly Tickets in the Tennessee Playcation Kid's Guide. I get that this intentionally is a callback to Willy Wonka's five Golden Tickets. But, much like the Candy Man, the outfit she wears to advertise this special promotion is one of the hands down creepiest things I have ever seen. Maybe I'm just envisioning the terrifying Oompa Loompa Tunnel Ride, Augustus Gloop getting sucked into a pipe on the chocolate river, Violet Beauregarde turning in a giant blueberry after chewing some gum (YOU'RE TURNING VIOLET, VIOLET!), Veruca falling down a trash chute, and Mike shrinking down to the size of a candy bar. And this all happened in a single chocolate factory! Imagine the horrors a state the size of Tennessee could unleash on the unsuspecting winners!  Willy Wonka (left) Dolly Parton (right)

Vladimir Gluten

Image
"There is no toast in gulag, only soggy bread, Comrade." - Vladimir Gluten, 2015

King Kong and Rexy - Archeologists Extraordinaire!

Image
My youngest son wanted an Indominus Rex for his birthday. We got him a King Kong instead. The shovels that are included in his Dino-bone brownies fit his hands perfectly. Baby sister insisted that Rexy get a shovel too, despite having only one hand. Kong- Dual-wielding Ape Archeologist and his one-armed assistant, Rexy!