Non-Gaming Stories

I have made no secret of the fact that I truly enjoy Phineas and Ferb. I have written several   entries   based either on   characters , the   Tri-State Area   itself, or   scenarios   I think would have been entertaining had they appeared in the show. Today, it hit me...

You know how sometimes you are looking at one thing but you see something else? It used to happen to me all of the time. Or, at least often enough that I started making pictures to show everyone what I saw. Here are some of those things...

Baby Fight Club Doctor comes in with med student to examine our newborn... Doc (to student), "You will see that there is some bruising around the top of his head." Me (silently to myself), "Baby Fight Club will do that to you..." Post-Partum Pizza Thoughts Me last night - looking to warm up some leftover pizza at the hospital... "It would be nice if they had microwaves in the room...." Also me last night - "They can't do that because they are afraid some postpartum mothers might try to microwave their babies..." Also Also me last night - "𝘑𝘦𝘴𝘶𝘴 𝘊𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘵! How did I come up with 𝙏𝙃𝘼𝙏? 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙒𝙧𝙤𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙢𝙚?" Naming Guidelines So the hospital gave us a sheet of "rules" to use while naming The Child. 1. Numbers are fine as long as they are spelled out...i.e., we could name the baby 'Twelve' but not '12' and not Tr1stan. 2. No symbols or emojis so ...

I have been bouncing this idea around for the last year or so and given the depravity that comes with catering to the lowest common denominator of our society, I am fairly certain that if I had the know-how (like proficiency in coding and Flash Animation), I could make buckets of money if I were ever to develop this app. I picture a side-scrolling game where the player assumes control of a character that must navigate a path laden with lurking enemies.  These enemies are not goblins, trolls, soldiers from an opposing army or anything of that sort.  The enemy the player would face are BABIES.  Each baby, once defeated, would explode in a shower of confectionery treats like lollipops, candy canes, or hard candies.  These treats are then collected and can be spent on Power-Ups like armor (from medieval to futuristic “Iron Man” suits) or weapons ranging from Giant Mallets and Rubber Band Guns to Smart Bombs. As each level of the game is completed, the Enemy Bab...

I went through a phase a couple years ago where I thought that these would make hilarious window decals. I still think that I'm right.

My Guinea Pig post from the other day got me to thinking about a set of pets from my childhood. I forget how old I was at the time but one year, while my brothers and I were small (I estimate that I was maybe 8 years old), we received hamsters for Christmas. Given the holiday, we chose Yuletide-themed names - Jingles, Jangles, and Noel. Jangles was my hamster. At the end of the first evening, I said "good night" went to bed and by the time I woke up the next morning my hamster had died. Being a young child I was distraught. My parents went back to the store and purchased a replacement hamster. I do not remember the name I gave to Hamster Number Two but it only lasted about a week before passing on to the Great Wheel in the Sky. Hamster #3's name has also been lost to the ravages of time ("Charcoal" sounds like it could be right) but it survived a whole year before dying. I had very limited contact with the animals and I promise that I d...

There I was, navigating the nearly abandoned thoroughfares of an all but forgotten mercantile center.  This derelict temple dedicated to American Consumerism had been reduced to a sparse handful of retailers struggling to keep the crumbling edifice alive.  My footfalls echoed off of hard tiles that had been polished to a near mirror sheen by the endless laps of elderly walkers shuffling along like zombies and futile attempts to stave off their own deaths. Window frames filled with dusty glass provided hazy views into the vacant emporiums as I strode by.  A lone bird that had somehow been trapped inside fluttered past - the only other living thing I had seen since entering the ruin. I rounded a corner in the plaza and saw it off in the distance - bolted to the wall, an atavistic feature even in this relic of a shopping center - a pay phone. This anachronistic bygone had been forced into obscurity by its evolutionary descendants and nearly legislated out o...

I picked up a set of Story Dice at Target for just a buck last Friday night. For those of you who don't know, Story Dice are a set of dice with pictures on them that are used to get a story or conversation started. You roll the dice and then make up a story (a sentence or two is fine) based on the images that appear. This particular set consists of four six-sided dice (4d6) with pictures of various camping-related things, animals, and activities - a tent, a pop-up trailer, trees, a bear, S'mores and so on. Some businesses use them as a tool to teach improved collaboration or as a "warm up" for creative meetings. Me? I encourage nonsensical combinations. For example, a roll of... resulted in... "On a cloudy camping trip, I wrestled a squirrel for S'mores." became, "When I was camping, I took my canoe out to look at the clouds when a pine cone hit me in the head." Then there was...

I originally posted this as a status on Facebook about four years ago and thought I would reshare it with all of you today. Enjoy! - - - - - This morning I woke up, rolled out of bed and began my long slow stagger to the bathroom with my toothbrush in hand.  I opened the door to my room, stepped out and closed it behind me so the cats would not think that I was allowing them in for a visit since my closet is The Most Fascinating Place on Earth as far as cats are concerned. It was a needless gesture because both of the boys, Rapey and Prometheus, were sitting side-by-side in front of the sliding glass door, enraptured by something that was going on outside.  My curiosity was piqued and I paused to join them in their observation. I was treated to a majestic scene transpiring in the backyard, just beyond the chain link fence.  A baby deer, dappled with the white spots of his youth was nursing from his mother.  There was a sense of subdued wonder, warmth in the air...

A gentleman walked up to me as I was working the hotel front desk with a map of what we, here in Minnesota, call the North Shore.  He was curious if we carried any maps of the “South Shore”.  I have never heard anyone ask for a map of the South Shore.  I told him that pretty much any map of Duluth would work for practical purposes and he seemed satisfied with my answer and walked away. But, his question left me unsettled.  He sort of had a point.  If we are the North Shore, then shouldn’t there be a south shore? And really, North Shore of What? Lake Superior? Last time I looked at a map, CANADA was the North (and most of the East) Shore of Lake Superior. At best, we are the West Shore and Wisconsin and Michigan are the South Shore. I get that “West Shore” isn’t likely to evoke the same sense of poetic visualization that “North Shore” does and I understand that we are trying to imply “the section of shoreline o...