Alternative Food Names
Vladimir Gluten
"There is no toast in gulag, only soggy bread, Comrade." - Vladimir Gluten, 2015
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Baby Fight Club Doctor comes in with med student to examine our newborn... Doc (to student), "You will see that there is some bruising around the top of his head." Me (silently to myself), "Baby Fight Club will do that to you..." Post-Partum Pizza Thoughts Me last night - looking to warm up some leftover pizza at the hospital... "It would be nice if they had microwaves in the room...." Also me last night - "They can't do that because they are afraid some postpartum mothers might try to microwave their babies..." Also Also me last night - "๐๐ฆ๐ด๐ถ๐ด ๐๐ฉ๐ณ๐ช๐ด๐ต! How did I come up with ๐๐๐ผ๐? ๐๐๐๐ฉ ๐๐จ ๐๐ง๐ค๐ฃ๐ ๐ฌ๐๐ฉ๐ ๐ข๐?" Naming Guidelines So the hospital gave us a sheet of "rules" to use while naming The Child. 1. Numbers are fine as long as they are spelled out...i.e., we could name the baby 'Twelve' but not '12' and not Tr1stan. 2. No symbols or emojis so ...
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